Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize