Fine. I'll sleep in my office
That's intense
Porn is love you can see.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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