I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
