i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
