you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
