i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
