Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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