he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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