What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
This is my gift to your gina
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
