i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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