apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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