good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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