yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
