is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize