He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize