i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
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does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
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I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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