More tranny stories later!
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
