Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize