i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
