Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
farters have to be the big spoon...
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..