so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Come see our sink grown plant.
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She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
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the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I am one with the molecules
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.