it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
