i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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