i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
barbara walters just said penis...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize