Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I am spending my child support on dildos
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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