just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
