Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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