i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
