Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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