I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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