2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
