so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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