There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
