she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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