were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
