nut hugger
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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