I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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