I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
