Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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