Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
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