he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
