so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
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