hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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