did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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