a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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