In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Randomize
