You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
