This dress was meant to end up on your floor
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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