May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
This is my gift to your gina
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
