I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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