For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
