this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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