i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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